Oh, the budget...

I may rip my hair out.

The FFG and I sat down over the weekend, all twitter-pated and ready to look over the menu that Shinto gave us. We have some big dreams for what to do. Unfortunately, we've hit a snag.

I need to get more definite pricing on what an open bar for one hour would cost, but as it stands, we cant' afford this place. *smacks head* Are you kidding me? Dirt cheap, and we still can't afford it? Something's got to be off.

So, I'm reworking my budget and trying to figure out where the heck I've gone wrong. *le sigh*

Honestly, right now, my $10k budget for 100 people is looking more like a $12k budget. And on top of that, my parents (who are going to have to be the biggest contributors to this wedding, since we have no money and his dad is out of a job) have a mile-long list of people they want to invite that exceeds our 100-person limit. Which means more money. And we're already over.

Ps: these people that my parents want to invite are people I don't know - never even heard of - and who have no vested interest in myself or the Frugal Fabulous Groom. Is that normal? Because, honestly, I'm a very private person, and I feel uncomfortable saying my very intimate and personal vows to my groom in front of a group of strangers. It cheapens it to me, somehow. Is anyone else going through this? Because I feel like this is a normal thing and I'm just over-reacting.

I've got to figure this out. There has got to be a way to make this work. I'm already planning on buying an inexpensive dress, we've thrown out all flowers but what important people will be carrying with them during the night, we're not having a videographer, I've settled for an iPod instead of a live band (which we'll still have, if I can just find an extra $500 in the budget)... there has got to be some other place I can cut back to make this work.

contests and giveaways and etsy (oh my!)

First off: if you're in to giveaway contests and big sales, go to snippet&ink and check out their latest post. There are a few links to check out - specifically the ones for the 4 pashminas giveaway, and the etsy lotus necklace giveaway. End plug.

I've become an etsy stalker, it's official. Last night, I was looking for wedding gowns on etsy, and I found the most beautiful designer: bellinabridal. Her dresses are all gorgeous - I love her vision! I rarely find a designer that just sees beauty the same way I see it, but we're definitely on the same page. I specifically love one of her older designs, Laurel, and have fallen madly in love with both the dress AND the price. Who can go wrong with such luscious fashion for $600 + free shipping?

I would, of course, ask if she could add straps. I'm worried though - can I buy my wedding dress off of etsy? Is that safe? She says she has a shop in Italy (where she lives) and one in NYC (she's American) but on etsy, she has no buyer reviews. She seems legit for everything but that. I could ask for referals and testimonies, I guess. What do you guys think? Is it safe to buy a wedding gown at etsy?

Shinto? Or shit, no?

Well, the FFG and I met with the Event Coordinator from Shinto this evening.

The manager was wrong about their prices. He told us they were in the $35-$85/per range, so we talked about it and decided we couldn't probably safely budget for $55-$60, tops. Anymore would involved the sale of our first-born.

But when we got there tonight, the EC showed us some quite different figures. They have 3 main packages, priced as follows: $35, $45, and $55.

You heard me. $55 was their expensive one.

What does that include? Appetizers and sushi, dinner, one drink from the bar, champagne toast, and dessert. Plus, exclusive use of the facilities. The only other costs would be taxes, gratuity, and a small compensation for any profits they would miss out on by not having the restaurant open while we are there (a figure based on the average of the date from past years, amounting to a couple hundred at most).

Um, hello? Have I died and gone to Affordable Heaven?

We're thrilled about the $45 pkg, which includes an upgrade to some of the nicer, pricier menu options and a choice of two entrees instead of just one. The $55 pkg is even more of an upgrade, but to things we don't even care about. Saving money already! Oh, and since they're a restaurant and not an outside caterers, our guests will have a menu with about 8 selections to choose from. Not just 2, and not to be picked 2 months before.

So that's what is all included. In addition, the EC is willing to work with us w/o charging a dime more, ie: we can have those appetizers and sushi during cocktail hour if we like, then dinner later. We can have cocktail hour at the bar or on the patio, and the dinner area will be curtained off during that time. She's totally flexible on presentation. We can bring in our own centerpieces, our own cake - we can even bring in our own food from outside for those who just can't stomach Japanese, and we still only pay for those who eat. So the FFG's father who eats nothing but steak and potatoes wil be taken care of.

That's right: if we tell them 100 are going to be there, and only 90 show up to eat, we pay for 90 people.

We're discussing the option of an open bar during cocktail hour, which we understand will be extra. But when we sign that contract, she charges us a flat rate on the alcohol which we decide upon ahead of time based on how many and what kinds of drinks we think will be consumed, and if we go over our limit, they pick up the tab.

They require a 50%, non-refundable deposit one month b4 the wedding, the rest of the balance is due at the end of the night.

Music, live or prerecorded, is an option. A dance floor can be done. Even my mother said the idea sounded like a good one, and she seemed excited.

I'm just not seeing a down-side here...

A Big "Thank You!"

Thanks for the advice and the shared excitement over my venue, everyone! Your response has been an amazing encouragement!

I have been tremendously disappointed as of late, as day after day over the last two months of searching for a venue has proven itself fruitless. And this after three years of doing my homework! Lest any of you should despair as I did - be encouraged! Sometimes, even all of your hardwork is not the answer in the end. Sometimes it's just keeping your eyes peeled for any opportunity. Sometimes, it's using the resources around you and talking to friends and family.

And sometimes, it's just dumb luck. (Me.)

Keep a stiff upper lip - it's not as hopeless as it seems, I promise. =)

WestsideWedding: normally, Shinto closes early on Sundays, so instead of turning business away for a night, they're just staying open a little longer. More cost effective. In fact, they even told us up front that if we held it on a Friday or Saturday night, it would take a lot more to justify it.

The greater Cleveland area is not a happenin' place on Sunday nights.

chicncheap: I will definitely keep an eye on that bar tab when we talk to the EC on Wednesday. Thanks for the heads up!

Cross your fingers for us, and pray this won't cost more than we've been led to believe!

My Advice? ALWAYS Ask!

SOOO much to update today! I'm so behind!

First of all: new survey today! Look at the tool bar to your right. I'll probably try to post a new one every Monday, so keep your eyes peeled. Survey ends Friday night.

Okay, on to more important topics: VENUES!

Thursday was our 3 year dating anniversary, so we spent the weekend celebrating. We had wanted to go to Shinto for a while, but never had the time.money.excuse. The FFG called to make reservations for Saturday night, but we were told that they were closed for a wedding reception. Bummed, b/c that was the only night we had available to go, we decided to stop by for lunch instead.

First impression walking in the door: ...whoa. Amazing. Beautiful lighting. Modern and chic lounge/bar area. lovely fountain running in to a koi pond. A bridge with a clear floor, so you can see the koi swimming under your feet. You'll have to see for yourself.


The food was the best Japanese I've ever had (and that's saying something), and the show that the hibachi chef put on - entertaining? Absolutely!

So, as we sat there, thinking about the trouble we've had finding an affordable venue, I said, "Wait... did you say they're closed for a wedding?" I swear I saw a lightbulb turn on over his head. We started dreaming waaay more than we should have, and probably got our hopes up a little too high. We asked our server, who referred us to the manager, who referred us to their event coordinator, and presto-chango! We have an appt. Wednesday evening to talk about specifics!

Our server, Chris, said if we do it we should request him as a server - which we'll totally do. The manager quoted us a loose range of figures on packages anywhere from about $35/head to $85/head, depending on what we wanted. I almost exploded, and the FFG said "Where do we sign?"

I can't wait for Wednesday night! I'll let you know all the details when we find them out.

Of course, this blows away most of the ideas we had originally come up with (coffee house theme and all) but we're entirely ready to do that! I want to share with you all of the ideas we had that we probably won't be using, now that we're changing our theme. Maybe you can put some of them to good use!

More to come, people! Stay tuned, and stay classy!

FFB

The "One"

O. M. G.

I think we've found it...

Midsummer Eve

I showed my last color board to my bridesmaids yesterday. They all loved it. A few of them even started fighting over who gets to wear which dress. Totally awesome.

I thought I'd find something else that inspired me and try to create a color board for it. So I did that today. But I'm a little disappointed in the results. I think it looks good... but it's not me. And it's not my fiance, either. I'm just not sure that it fits into our genre of frugal fabulousness.

But I still like it. I still think it's good.

If you like it and think it's good, you're totally welcome to steal it. It's based on the painting "Midsummer Eve" by Edward Robert Hughes. What? I told you, I'm taking Art History.

Color board

I attempted to put together a color board of inspiration for a color scheme that I may or may not choose for our wedding. The FFG is really fine with whatever, has a few ideas and preferences, but really just wants it to look good, so he'll go along with anything I come up with. I showed him this color board this evening when I finished it, and he really liked the scheme.

It's different than what we originally had in mind, but I think it's pretty, and it's at least a) something physical [well, digital, but visible] that I can actually see, not just in my head, and b) a starting point to get my creative juices flowing about this. Maybe tweaking a few things here and there will help with finding the right venue to hold it.

My inspiration came from a few things, but mostly my love of all things Pride and Prejudice and Jane Austen as a whole. I'm not the type to go so crazy over a cliche like this and make my bridesmaids all wear Edwardian period dresses with cap sleeves and empire waists that make them look prego.

I'm in to inspiration, not imitation.

But, as much as I *heart* Colin Firth, I've been known to say that the newer P&P on screen with Keira Knightly is like a moving art piece. With it's visually stunning use of color, and (sometimes unneccesarily impressive) staging and scenary, as well as a soundtrack to melt one's stubbornly Elizabeth Bennet heart, it always seems to bring out the romantic in me.

Like I said: I may or may not make use of this color board for my wedding. That being said, regardless of what I choose, I encourage anyone who may find this to be inspirational to them to go ahead and use some (or all) elements of it for their own. Someone ought to get some use out of it.

I will, of course, be working diligently on my next color board: Pride and Prejudice... and Zombies.

Venues

Finding a rental hall is next to impossible in this area.

Oh, don't get me wrong - it's not that they aren't available.

But, even if they weren't all booked up 2 years in advance, they're all way out of my price range.

About a year ago, long before we were engaged, I checked out a place called Windows on the River. It's an old converted powerhouse building. It's just the type of setting the FFG and I would like to have this little shindig - brick walls, city view, even a great spot on the river that spills out in to Lake Erie. It'd be perfect for an urban-jazz coffee house. Good news: they cover everything - food, rentals, bar, centerpieces, cake. Bad news: it's still out of our price range.

But, ever since my mother attended a wedding there about a month ago she's been obsessed. I mean obsessed. She spends every conversation talking about what a great deal this place was. I even diplomatically tried to direct her toward researching some other details for me before she drove me nuts. No dice.

So, I finally emailed them. And, sure enough - even after asking them if they can give me any breaks by excluding some of the extras or changing the menu - they can't budge much on the price.

So, after close to two months of engagement, I am no closer to having a venue booked.

So what's next? Well, we have a friend who is an ordained minister and has offered to officiate our wedding. We're going to talk to him in a couple weeks in our first pre-marital counseling session and see if his church has a place where we could hold a reception. That would kill two birds with one stone: ceremony and reception site (both of which are still in question).

Wish me luck... this is going to be tough.

Pretties!

Je t'adore! This jewelry from made by moe (coursety of something old, something new) is so refreshing! And at an average price of around $30? Makes wedding jewelry totally affordable, not to mention bridesmaids gifts! Still too pricey for each of your 10 bridesmaids? No problem - with at least a dozen pieces $15 and under, you can find something special for each of them, and still keep it Frugally Fabulous. I'm in!




In case you didn't catch it, that's a working compass necklace up top - how original! And I would totally wear these down the aisle, I'm not even kidding:




Wouldn't that look so fantastically quirky for pictures?




There's even a necklace that bears my name. What could possibly be more perfect? I think it's a sign...